I used to be down on myself because I felt like I lacked the charisma that is needed to truly be successful. It certainly helps, though a person’s character is the more important factor. This was recently backed up by Michael Hyatt in his post 3 Forces that Shape Character. He further reminds us that it is an inside-out job and offers three key attributes that shape character. If we want to develop our character, we need to give attention to each of them.

1. The Input We Consume.
2. The Relationships We Pursue.
3. The Habits We Acquire.

I think all three of these go pretty much hand-in-hand and are essential to pursuing a refining life on purpose. The reason why is because, when we break each of those attributes down, we see that first, they are active. We “consume” and “pursue” and “acquire” each of the elements that are the subject matter. And that subject matter – being Input, Relationships and Habits – enables us to learn, grow, mature and ultimately, continue refining our lives. In a secular example, this article about Yahoo CEO, Marissa Meyer suggests that her success can be credited to constantly pursuing new ways of learning by staying on the cutting edge, avoiding becoming outdated and being aware of emerging trends. She reflects, learns and evolves. It shows that she understands, as the article states…

…no matter how successful you may become, it's important to keep on learning. What may change, however, is how you learn as you become more and more established in your career.

To move this into a biblical perspective, as Rick Warren points out on character, we are to “become mature, attaining to the whole measure of the fullness of Christ” (Ephesians 4:13 NIV). He goes on to state that this is life’s most important task and he made it clear in the Sermon on the Mount just how important it is to do so. That means a refining life is one of changing lives rather than informing them, As Warren suggests, “Character is never built in a classroom. Character is built in the circumstances of life.” I like to think of it as this…

There is no textbook for personal experience. (btw, click here to Tweet that!)

We are reminded that God is the ultimate architect, author, painter, creator, etc. He builds our character by allowing us to experience moments where we are tempted to do the exact opposite character quality. “Character development always involves a choice. When we make the right choice, our character grows more like Christ.” In those situations and moments, ask yourself: “What is the right Christian response?” If you are consuming the right input, pursuing the right relationships and acquiring the right habits, you will know the answer more often than not.