My Struggle with Impostor Syndrome
I grew up in a home where we depended on food stamps - actual food stamps that could not be hidden at the checkout. I got free lunches in school, always had knockoff clothes and had a paper route that was a literal lifeline. These sorts of things can really impact a young life. But I went with it and survived. I went to college where few people knew about my background, and did as much as I could to stuff that away from others. Then, towards the end of college, I started to gravitate toward a career in public relations. Movies like Wag the Dog were fun to enjoy. I loved watching the way pro wrestling spun the narrative of storylines. And I marveled at successful marketing campaigns of big business, always dissecting the orchestration of it all. That sort of thing is fun, but it’s an unrealistic way of life if we allow God to work in us. I started my career and experienced general success. And then I began questioning myself. I worried that I was not good enough. There was a fear of being exposed for being less than what I was. And it was all unfounded. But that didn’t make it go away.
Impostor Syndrome keeps us from being who God created us to be. And the Devil loves it. But we don't always have to control the narrative. Take out the earbuds, and thrive.
You Cannot Always Control the Narrative
In the world of pro wrestling, they don’t always get to control the storyline. Sometimes the crowd unexpectedly turns and dictates who gets “over” or fails to react with the level of emotion to keep a storyline going. My career didn’t go as I had laid it out. I didn’t work in PR. Some elements of it, yes, but not really. I am not (yet) a New York Times best selling author, as I had planned. God did allow me to accomplish my three main dreams in life - and that left me helpless. Seriously. God blessed me. Then he blessed me by drastically changing me. God controls the narrative. Not me.A God Controlled Narrative is One that Conquers the Impostor Syndrome
How blessed is God! And what a blessing he is! He’s the Father of our Master, Jesus Christ, and takes us to the high places of blessing in him. Long before he laid down earth’s foundations, he had us in mind, had settled on us as the focus of his love, to be made whole and holy by his love. Long, long ago he decided to adopt us into his family through Jesus Christ. (What pleasure he took in planning this!) He wanted us to enter into the celebration of his lavish gift-giving by the hand of his beloved Son. - Ephesians 1:6 (MSG)
You must ask God what he thinks of you, and you must stay with the question until you have the answer. The battle will get fierce here. This is the last thing the Evil One wants you to know.So true! The last thing the Devil wants you to know is who you are - a blessed child of God, created and adopted into God’s family. Christ gives you strength and transforms you! However, we too often forget that and need to take to telling ourselves the Gospel.
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