Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will exalt you. ~ James 4:10 ESV
Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up. ~ James 4:10 NIV
What do you do when you find yourself in the midst of personal turmoil? When you feel powerless, helpless and desperate? Humble thyself.
It’s human nature to tell yourself that you will “work through it” alone. But that’s the last thing God wants you to do. When you are faced with times of anxiety, He wants you to turn to Him. I found this out the hard way.
I was in a rut of manic emotions where I celebrated extreme highs and suffered extreme lows. I kept so much inside and frequently didn’t even know what I was experiencing. There were many moments I had wondered if my physical and emotional health would hold up. My career was absolutely meaningless and my ambition – the one thing I personally clung to for much of my life – was missing. I really had little passion or desire. I had not been in so dark a place since the year before I had become a Christian.
It wasn’t that I was so full of myself or that I was at rock bottom. I had no answer. So, while at Hilton Head, South Carolina, where I had been invited to present at an industry conference, I sought answers from the one source I could trust and rely upon without reservation.
I was alone, walking along the beach as evening approached. Had been in town maybe an hour at most. At a time that I should have been basking in personal triumph – heck, I was invited and flown to this wonderful location based upon personal merit without having to shell out a single dime of my own – I was feeling lower than low. Down on myself, I stripped to my shorts and ran into the crashing waves.
I stood there and asked God to bring me down. To tear me down and make me feel as small as that morning I stood at the Grand Canyon (some 12 years earlier). And He did.
A wave crashed into me and He knocked me down. I stood back up and dared Him to do it again. Again, he obliged.
I got up and pushed myself out further, praying the whole time. Conversing with God. Asking Him, begging Him to help me snap out of the funk that was my life. To bring about the changes that only He can bring. Whether it was inside of me or others, I needed something to give.
There were times I had to wonder how stupid I was (and I am sure the other people along the shoreline were wondering too!). There were times some of the waves took me so far under and pushed me so far under, I found myself fighting for air.
I battled in that unique meditation for a good 45 minutes. Finally, I left the water, exhausted and saltwater in my lungs. There were no answers in my head, but my heart had felt relief of sorts I still can’t explain.
God convicted me. No matter how deep I go or how high I climb in this world, I’m still an itty bitty little spec in God’s grand plan. I’m refined with each and every moment, yet specifically designed for it!
To Him be all glory.