Are you fooling yourself? It’s an honest question, but one that is hard to answer. Along with it comes other questions. For instance, how do you know you are fooling yourself? And how might we get awareness of fooling ourselves?

It’s really no simple matter, but it is one that Jonathan Edwards found to be a vital spiritual proficiency. I think that’s because, in so doing, we gain a broader sense of peace and form of contentment that few people ever really do experience.

What Edwards Thought About Fooling Yourself

In his diary, on August 10, Jonathan Edwards wrote:

As a help against that inward shameful hypocrisy, to confess frankly to myself all that which I find in myself, either infirmity or sin; also to confess to God, and open the whole case to him, when it is what concerns religion, and humbly and earnestly implore of him the help that is needed; not in the least to endeavour to smother what is in my heart, but to bring it all out to God and my conscience.

That imagery of “to smother what is in my heart” is pretty dark and really speaks volumes. And before that, he is pretty frank in saying he must seek out ways to be honest with himself. What’s more, he is genuine in his awareness that it is only through God that he might find that truth.

What are we gaining when smothering what is in our hearts? As Edwards describe, it is the means by which, “I may arrive at a greater knowledge of my own heart.”

Further, he details how it allows him to focus his spiritual meditations. Clearly, Edwards knew and understood the perils of fooling yourself.

It is what led to his resolution #64. So let’s explore it now.

Jonathan Edwards Resolution #64

Edwards’ Resolution #64 (as it was written)

Prayer: 64. Resolved, when I find those “groanings which cannot be uttered” (Rom. 8:26), of which the Apostle speaks, and those “breakings of soul for the longing it hath,” of which the Psalmist speaks, Psalm 119:20, that I will promote them to the utmost of my power, and that I will not be weary, of earnestly endeavoring to vent my desires, nor of the repetitions of such earnestness. July 23, and August 10, 1723.

Edwards’ Resolution #64 (in my modernized language)

Resolved: Whenever I experience “groanings which cannot be uttered” as described in Romans 8.26, and the “longings” that consume our souls as written in Psalm 119:20, I’ll fully embrace them. And I will not hesitate to sincerely express or repeat my experiences so I may benefit from them.

It’s not often that Edwards specifically references scripture in his resolutions, so I think it is important to focus on those when he does.

In this instance, he uses two verses in this resolution. Let’s look at those.

For in this hope we were saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what he sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience.

Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words.  – Romans 8:24-26

My soul is consumed with longing for your rules at all times. – Psalm 119:20

When I Experience Groanings

In Romans, the word and concept of “groanings” may seem peculiar at first. It was for me. In this case, it’s not a response to one of my “dad jokes.” It’s so much more.

The verse begins with the word, “Likewise.” That tells me there must be something before it to help me understand the context. So if we start at verse 24, we learn it is about an understanding of “hope.” You see, when we hope, it’s not for something we already have. It’s for what we don’t have… in other words, things unseen.  Also, our hope must be tempered with patience

Ug! Not patience! Anything… any-thing, other than patience. Yet, the spirit works on and strengthens us in our weaknesses. And, in our weakness, we sometimes know there is a greater need, yet we don’t know what it is, nor do we know how to pray.

Fortunately, the Holy Spirit does. And that shows us what these groanings represent. They are our very feelings of need and hope for turning back our weaknesses.

One of my favorite scriptural commentators, Warren Wiersbe says of this passage…

When He was ministering on earth, Jesus groaned when He saw what sin was doing to mankind (Mark 7: 34; John 11: 33, 38). Today the Holy Spirit groans with us and feels the burdens of our weaknesses and suffering. But the Spirit does more than groan. He prays for us in His groaning so that we might be led into the will of God. We do not always know God’s will. We do not always know how to pray, but the Spirit intercedes so that we might live in the will of God in spite of suffering. The Spirit “shares the burden.” (from Wiersbe’s Be Right: How to Be Right with God, Yourself, and Others)

You’re fooling yourself when you think you have all the answers or you long for the addictive fillings provided by a corrupt world. When something is missing in your life, don’t ignore the ambiguous groanings and long for God’s will.

You’re fooling yourself when you think you have all the answers or you long for the addictive fillings provided by a corrupt world. When something is missing in your life, don’t ignore the ambiguous groanings and long for God’s will.

When I Experience Longings

Just like groanings described in Roman, the psalmist speaks of longings. Just what are these longings?

First off, they are not longings for things of this world. No. In fact, they are for the laws that are not of this world. A desire for God’s rules.

Psalm 119 is the longest of the Psalms. It shows how the word enables God’s children to grow in holiness and strengthen them for handling later persecution.  Though the author of it is unknown, the intense hunger for God is a good example for us to follow.

Because the longings are for the laws of God and his word rather than the law of the land in which we are not actual citizens, it means we must follow the.  regardless of what people think of us for it.

It reminds me of a great DC Talk lyric from the song, Jesus Freak…

The high and lofty, they see me as weak
But I won’t live and die for the power they seek

I Will Celebrate and Accentuate Your Will

“A river without any banks is just a puddle.”

I was introduced to this notion as I was struggling to out this post.  I was struck by how appropriate it is here. See what God did there?

What I take away from Edwards’ 64th resolution boils down to this… The river that flows on the earth is obedient to God’s ordering and will.

Likewise, it’s only with God’s will, law, and our obedience to it that the river may flow. And it flows abundantly, overcoming rapids and producing just the right current as it nourishes the land in which it traverses. You see, the entirety of the land benefits. Among other natural miracles, it results in greener lands, fertile soil, wildflowers, strengthened trees and a vibrant scene.

Allow that same will, law, and word to flow in you. Even when ambiguous groanings persist, long for them and more.

Perhaps your life might be just as vibrant.